According to Intimacy Directors and Coordinators, “An intimacy director or coordinator is a choreographer, an advocate for actors, and a liaison between actors and production for scenes that involve nudity / hyper-exposed work, simulated sex acts, and/or intimate physical contact.” Intimacy directors collaborate with a production’s director, actors and creative team to choreograph moments of intimacy that are exciting, safe and repeatable.

Physical intimacy on stage can be really scary for actors. They may be intimidated by what the moment requires, worried about making their scene partner uncomfortable, or have had negative experiences performing intimacy in the past. That fear limits their creativity, and how well the story of the play gets told. Intimacy directors help to create clear boundaries and choreography for moments of intimacy so that actors feel empowered to do their best work.

There are 3 main categories of staged intimacy.

Intimate Physical Contact: Any sexual or non-sexual contact that is intimate, such as giving birth, kissing, or a massage.
Simulated Sex Acts: Any sexual contact between characters or self-stimulation, such as sexual intercourse or masturbation.
Nudity/Exposure: Any act that involves a level of undress that feels vulnerable or intimate, such as breastfeeding, taking a shower, undressing or removing a headscarf.

Ultimately, what counts as “intimacy” is defined by the actors and director. If something feels like a moment of intimacy, then it is.

Not at all. Similar to dance, the structure and safety provided by intimacy choreography helps actors to feel more free to fully commit to their performances. Additionally, intimacy choreography can allow for some improvisation (within safe boundaries) when it’s needed. Once they’ve worked with an intimacy director, most actors never want to work without one again, and request them for future productions.

If you think you may need an intimacy director for your production, you probably do, even if there’s only a small amount of intimacy that needs to be staged. If your script is explicitly calling for moments of intimacy, you should definitely seek the support of an intimacy director.

Note: University productions, where student actors often feel apprehensive about performing intimacy on stage and are navigating the teacher-student power dynamic, can particularly benefit from the presence of an intimacy director, even if the production only calls for intimacy like hand-holding, hugging, or a kiss on the cheek.

Like any member of a production’s creative team, intimacy directors are collaborators. They work with the director, actors, stage management, and designers to help bring the director’s vision to life in ways that are both safe and exciting. Generally, the work can be divided into 3 stages:

Pre-production: One of the first steps in an intimacy director’s process is having a conversation with the production’s director to learn about their vision, and create a breakdown of the script that identifies the different moments of intimacy. They also do any necessary dramaturgical research and touch base with the stage manager about rehearsal policies.

Rehearsals: During the rehearsal period, the intimacy director has initial conversations with the actors about their comfort levels and personal boundaries regarding the moments of intimacy. They then work with the actors and director to choreograph the moments of intimacy so that they are safe and repeatable. They will also work with other members of the creative team as needed (For example, working with the costume designer to make sure that modesty garments are provided to actors for scenes with nudity).

Tech Rehearsals: Intimacy directors are often present during tech rehearsals. They check sightlines to ensure the of the integrity of the intimacy choreography and the dignity of the actor, communicate intimacy policies with backstage crew, and continue to work with other members of the creative team.

It depends. Intimacy directors can choreograph in as little time as 1-3 rehearsals (a few kisses), or be more involved throughout the creative process if the production calls for a lot of staged intimacy (several sex scenes).

In some productions, all that may be needed is an intimacy consultation, in which an intimacy director calls in remotely throughout the rehearsal process to help set up and maintain best practices for the acting company and creative team.